If you are a parent, you know you just can’t be perfect all the time. In fact, I have long stretches when the failures—the spectacular, extraordinary failures—far outnumber the successes.

Days when there’s no patience in me.

When I raise my voice.

When I can’t control my non-verbal communication.

Fail, fail, FAIL.

Declaring, “Failure is not an option,” may make for a great (read: mediocre) slogan, but I just can’t agree. Failure—at least short-term failure—is a constant option for me, and here’s the deal:

This is a good thing.

Failure is always an option because, when I can admit that I have failed, I can begin to accept responsibility for all the things that I’m not, and that is the beginning of growth, reconciliation, and relationship. I know people who have never failed, which really means that they’ve never admitted failure. Their lives—along with the lives of those cosest to them—may be a hot mess, but responsibility and fault is always “out there” with “them”, never ever within themselves.

And so they stay stuck. 

You can’t grow until you have something you need to grow past. 

You can’t succeed until you see that you’re failing.

You can’t heal until you can see that you are the one who is broken…

Refuse to “fail”, and eventually you’ll get what you wish for.

But you’ll also get

… A refusal to grow

… A refusal to heal

… A refusal to be reconciled

… And that’s no deal at all.

I’ll choose the possibility of failure every time.