Try Vulnerability (Morning Pages, 8.29.2019)

Truth is, I like to power through most everything:

  • marriage
  • friendships
  • sickness
  • depression
  • work

“Nose to the grindstone.”

Push harder.

Stand my ground.

Assert myself.

Get my needs met.

Where does that get me?

Not very far, oh—and very mentally and emotionally sick.

Have to continually remind myself; actually RE-learn, every single day it seems, that VULNERABILITY is the way that I’m to posture myself in the world.

Only gods are invulnerable. The rest of us are decidedly fragile.

This is okay; it’s the way it’s meant to be.

So when I wake, it’s okay for me to say, “I don’t have what it takes today.”

To say, “I really am feeling weak, and I need some help.”

To say, “How can I help?”

Without being overly dramatic, very few people around me—if anyone—is going to teach me how to do this.

I won’t learn it from Netflix.

Vulnerability is upside down, and is counter.

In a place and time where we all clamor and scream to get what we want, there remains a tradition that says, “I don’t NEED to get what I want, because I have a Power/Father/God/Mystery that will provide what I NEED, so that I can help YOU get what YOU need.”